How Long Will This Go On

Well, my sleep didn't improve much once I finally went to bed. I did notice that it was cooling down quickly so I opened up the apartment in an effort to make it more comfortable. I did feel a bit more relaxed, if that is the word since I wasn't really stressed, just energized for lack of a better word. I think I finally fell asleep about two hours after I got up.

Did I sleep any better? I don't know. I remember dreaming quite a bit but I also think that between 9:30 and 3:30 (when I finally gave up for the evening) I must have woken up at least 5 times. Of course one time was to take my meds.

I feel really run down. My legs continue to ache and my eyes feel very dry and tired. Today I even have a bit of a headache. But if my experience of the last few days is any indicaiton, I will probably feel okay late in the morning though I won't have any great store of energy.

I guess what I find particularly strange about all this is that comparatively, I feel like I'm doing so much better now than a couple weeks ago and certainly way better than back in May. It's pretty much a whole different world than prior to the move. My spirits are quite high and I have not felt so not depressed for years, certainly before the move to Villa Crappy.

I'm not sure how long I'm going to be able to keep myself from falling back into that if I am not able to sleep. I guess I worry that my sanity will be affected once again but in a way, I'm still hopeful that we'll get a new med prescribed next week and then we will start making some headway.

Luckily, there is nothing of import on the schedule this week so I can do as much as I feel like doing. I can rest up and work on whatever projects seem to fit my level of energy. I also know that when I get some information from the doctor I will be ready to do whatever research might be needed before making a decision. I just don't know how long I will be able to sustain this before it really becomes an emotional strain.